Hey there, guys! I’m back! And I am feeling the satisfaction one feels after they’ve finished reading a typical cliché romance novel with a happy ending because finishing a cliché romance novel is precisely what I’ve just done. Don’t we all just love reading clichés? Most of us (including me) deny liking clichés because it is considered to be something that only girly, emotional people like reading (typically girls) and make us look soft and sensitive. And cliché novels are so totally fictious! But these are all stereotypes, I tell you. Anyone can like cliché stories. Even the most rough, tough and hard looking people. Tbh, EVERYONE likes cliché! No matter how much you deny.
The reason why everyone likes cliché (be it novels or be it movies) is because everything is so perfect in it, I figured. Imagination is what comes right after and closest to reality. Since cliché, cheesy stuff rarely ever happens in reality and doesn’t seem quite as perfect in reality as compared to imagination, we go to the next closest thing. That is, cliché! Who doesn’t love happy endings where everyone gets what they want and deserve and there are rainbows and unicorns everywhere? Cliché novels and movies are instant mood turn ups if you ask me.
So, after finishing this novel I realised that almost all the novels and movies have a few things in common
#1: The missing parents
Rare is a cliché story where both- the hero and the heroine- have both their parents together in a healthy and loving relationship. Either the heroine or the hero or sometimes even both have either a single or abusive or always too busy and away on business trips or dead parents. And if by any chance you have been struck lucky to come across any cliché novel with both pairs of parents in their first marriage with a healthy and loving relationship, these parents allow their children to do things that no parents actually would ever allow their children to do. No matter how modern and open-minded the parents are.
#2: The eye colours
The heroes always have “orbs” of midnight blue, ocean blue, clear blue, crystal blue, sea green, emerald green, cat eye green, golden brown, chocolate brown, hazel, raven black or some other exotic coloured eyes.
The heroines are no less than the heroes. The heroines too possess exotic eyes. That sort of makes most of us lose hope because never have I ever read of a hero with simple eyes without any exotic speciality. Whatever is wrong with plain brown eyes? Why can’t they ever have plain shades of brown instead of unique shades of brown (if not totally unique shades that very few people in reality are gifted with the possession of)?
#3: The heroine never really gives a damn about her clothes yet it takes one if not two long paragraphs of description
The heroine never gives a **** (insert a beep) to what she wears and can simply not be bothered to dress to look good and yet somehow one long painful paragraph is spent with the heroine describing her outfit from the colour of her nail polish on her toenail to the make-up and hair styling. The heroine always just simply pulls clothes out from the closet (usually a walk in closet…). Miraculously, she somehow always “pulls out” matching tops with bottoms. I know that if I ever “simply pull out” clothes and wear them I am surely gonna get weird stares from anyone who sees me in the outfit. There is exactly a 99.9% chance that I will not pull out a matching outfit in the first attempt. There go all my hopes of having a cliché life…
Maybe there’s still hope.
Nah, just kidding.
#4: The hero in the beginning is always cold towards everyone and is a player
Now, the hero is always cold and has an I-don’t-give-a-beep attitude and has girls drooling all over him. His looks and body scream “p-l-a-y-e-r”. More often than not he’s a “bad boy” who LOVES falling in trouble. And almost always his actions are justified and have a heart-warming reason behind them!
#5: the hero is ALWAYS fit
The hero is always into the main sport of the school be it the European football, the American football or basketball etc. Did I mention that he always has a six-pack? Need I explain any further?
#6: The Heroine is plain yet perfect
Why can’t that be me? (Nah, just kidding… I am me and that’s unique and all that stuff) The heroine always calls herself average looking but when she starts describing herself you realise that she has the perfect eyes and the perfect height. She has one awesome figure and excellent facial features. Now if that is average then I don’t even wanna think where I stand…
#7: The heroine is perfect but is the school’s social outcast
Or she is the P.A of a CEO who also happens to be the hero of the story. I wonder if it is even possible to be so perfect and then be the social outcast of the school and have just one or two best friends. Never made sense to me.
#8: The ‘Populars’
ALL the cliché stories have a “popular” group which consists of:
- All the ‘Jocks’
- The Queen Bee who is the most popular girl of the school even though she’s a beep. I never understood how anyone as obnoxious could be popular cuz don’t you have to be liked by everyone (or most people) to be popular?
- The Queen Bee’s followers who have the brains of the sizes of pimples and are prettier than most. They possess no brain but are bullies and have to be in the cheerleading squad. Emphasis on the word “have”.
#9: The heroine’s problems disappear after the hero comes into her life
The parents disappear, the Queen Bee becomes mild, the school teachers forget to teach, studies and homework is forgotten and only comes back into existence when the heroine has nothing to do and feels studious…
I so need a hero just to get rid of my homework.
#10: And of course, the Happy Ending
Need I even explain?
That is all for now. Is there anything else that happens in cliché novels and movies that I missed out and didn’t write in the list? Do you like cliché stories? Let me know in the comments below! Don’t forget to like, follow and comment. I’ll be back with another blog post till then, good bye! I’d love to read your feedbacks! 🙂